“Yes, ice cream is delicious by itself, but today I want some with chocolate and a cherry on top just to change it up, to add a little bit of texture and flavor.” 5. “Sex toys can be like delicious toppings an already really good scoop of ice cream,” says Finn. Streicher suggests keeping in mind that a good sexual partner should want you to experience as much pleasure as possible-including with the use of a sex toy if that’s what you like.Įven if you have no trouble orgasming without a toy-or want to take the focus off orgasms as we mentioned-toys can still enhance something that’s already pleasurable. So if you’re worried about introducing toys to your partnered sex life, Dr. “Many, many women are not able to have an orgasm unless they use a vibrator,” Lauren Streicher, M.D., a clinical professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Northwestern University’s Feinberg School of Medicine, tells SELF. But it doesn’t have to be related to anything like that. Some people worry that a toy is there as a “replacement” or to make up for some sort of performance inadequacy. There’s often a weird shame about bringing toys into partnered sex. Most notably, you wouldn’t want to use a dildo you typically use for vaginal penetration to try some anal play unless it has a flared base so that you don’t risk losing it up your butt. Of course, if you’re going to switch up a toy’s intended use, make sure it’s safe to do so. “The Magic Wand was originally designed to be a back massager,” she points out. For instance, instead of sticking to the standard clit, vaginal, or anal stimulation when using a vibrator, Finn recommends exploring your nipples, stomach, thighs, the shaft of the penis, or even giving yourself a sensual massage. What does that look like in practice? You might want to start by mixing up how you’re using your toy. “This is about your body and your needs.” “A sex toy isn’t like a cell phone where if you have the one that does all the things and has all the features, it’s going to be ,” Finn says. While it’s a totally fair question for curiosity’s sake, popularity shouldn’t completely dictate which toy you use. People come into Babeland and ask Finn which toy sells best all the time (it’s the Magic Wand, surprise!). You automatically go for the most popular toy. Yes, it requires more cleanup, but it can also have a seriously great payoff. With that said, there’s an excellent case to be made for actually using lube with a sex toy. An even lazier hack? Use a barrier between your body and the toy, like an unlubricated condom or dental dam (depending on the type of toy) so there’s little to no cleanup required. It’s not as good as cleaning a toy, but a quick wipe down until you have time to wash it thoroughly is better than nothing. Finn suggests keeping unscented baby wipes or a cleanser like Babeland Toy Cleaner in a bedside drawer for easy access. Sometimes after you’ve finished with a sex toy, the last thing you want to do is hop up and clean it. It’s not like you’ll definitely wind up with a UTI if you don’t clean your sex toys, but keeping things sanitary does lower the chances of anything like this happening.Īll that said, everyone gets lazy. Using a dirty and deteriorated toy is honestly just impolite to your genitals-and it can theoretically also leave you at risk for health issues like urinary tract infections if bacteria on a toy makes its way into your urethra. Proper toy hygiene and storage are important for the longevity of your toy and your own safety. You don’t wash them correctly or enough (or at all). So if you use sex toys or are planning to start, here are a few mistakes you don’t want to make. However, there are a few precautions to take when you use sex toys and some general ground rules that can make sure you have an even better time. It’s like the world’s most pleasurable choose-your-own-adventure journey. It’s your body, so you get to pick what toys to use and how: the shape, the type of touch, the intensity, the location, and a lot more. The best thing about sex toys is that you can pretty much use them in whatever way brings you pleasure.
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